Dearest Little T,
It’s just before your baptism into the Catholic faith. You’re just a tiny little thing and there is probably no way you will remember it, so I want to tell you all about it. Of course, it hasn’t happened, yet, but I already know with 100% certainty what will occur. It will be a beautiful fall day in Northern Virginia. The church will be filled with people who love you to pieces: your mom and dad, all your grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends. There will be an intimate family gathering after where everyone will want to hold you and hug you because you are a little shiny piece of heaven.
You are brand new. You remind us, of how sweet life is. We’re all going to eat a little too much and all the hugging and kissing will make you a little cranky and then you’ll need a nap. Badly. We’ll all need a nap. It will be a perfect day. Just like you. And we are blessed to be part of your life.
As your Godparents, your mom and dad asked us to send you a letter. We write this letter to you now, with the expectation that you’ll receive it when you are old enough to read it, and with God’s help, lots of prayers, bunches of love, it will have some nugget of truth and helpfulness that you take with you as a touchstone into life. God gave us Ten Commandments, and so we’re going to follow his almighty template and give you the God Parents’ Ten Amendments. In addition to God’s perfect commandments we humbly and with just a tiny bit a humor give you these:
v Thou shalt be awesome!
Be awesome… wake up and resolve to give 100%. It’s tiring to be awesome… and there will be times when you won’t be. Maybe you can’t be awesome until you’ve had your coffee and egg and bacon sandwich. So have it… play the theme song to Indiana Jones in your head and go out and do more than you think you can. Give more than expected. Go longer and farther than imagined. Because the alternative is just ordinary.
Choose to be awesome. Choose whole wheat bread, egg whites, and turkey bacon. Choose to be amazing in every moment.
v Thou shalt have New Day’s Resolutions!
New Year’s resolutions are fun. Primarily because it’s always fun to guess how long you’ll stick to it. I think the average is probably forty-eight hours. But that’s okay. Resolutions… when you resolve to do something or to be someone or somehow… should not be an annual event. It should be a daily event. And sometimes hourly if necessary. When you wake up in the morning… after you’ve washed your face and done something about your morning breath, look at yourself in the mirror and remind yourself about your resolutions. Who do you, at that quiet moment before rest of the world is awake, resolve to be? What do you resolve to do? What do you resolve to appreciate? Remind yourself of all the things you have to be grateful for: your health, your job, your education, that you live in a free country, the right to vote, that you can read and write, your hands and feet, that at this moment more people than you imagine love and respect you, the ability to walk, time enough to make a difference, chocolate, soap, your mother, father, sister, music, whatever.
v Thou shalt drink water!
Drink a lot of water. Bunches. Oodles. Most people walk around in a constant state of dehydration. Dehydration decreases your mental sharpness. It impairs your immune system. It can wrinkle your skin. It can’t make you moody, confused, and dizzy. It can give you bad breath.
v There are some things you must do every day. Breathe. Floss. Pray.
And it’s okay to pray while you floss. God loves good oral hygiene. Pray. Know that God is everywhere and He hears all prayers and always answers. You just must be ready to receive the answer. You must believe. The answer to your prayer may not be exactly what you expected, or on a timeline that you would have liked, but you will get exactly what was meant for you. It will be exactly what is needed.
v Thou shalt shake what your mama gave you!
Dance. Get crazy. Dancing isn’t about looking good or having rhythm. It’s about enjoying music and your body. It’s about letting your mind, body, and spirit be free for a few minutes. It’s about forgetting all that is wrong with the world and enjoying the moment. In times of war, we have always closed the doors and danced. When bullets fly and bombs drop, the children close the doors and turn the music up over the noise and dance. When the market turns bearish, and there is nothing that can be done. Dance. When the doctor says you’ve got to lose weight, put down the pastry and dance really fast. When you are sad, dance. When you are happy, dance. When you hold a crying newborn, slow dance. Dance at red lights in the car. Spin, jump, slide. In the rain, through joy and pain, just dance. Dance every day. Preferably, naked, and slightly inebriated. Just close the blinds so you don’t freak out the neighbors.
v Thou must be awake to truly experience life! Wake up!
Kill your autopilot. He steals life. Be present. Don’t know what your autopilot is? If you find you have driven several minutes to the store, work, or school, and can’t remember the scenery…. Your were on autopilot. You should notice the sky, the flowers on the median, the trees, and at the very least, the street signs. Notice life.
v Thou must use nice words!
If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. If you don’t have anything nice to think, focus on something that makes you feel good. Repeat the name of that thing like a mantra until you are in a more positive mental space. It doesn’t matter what that thing is, just repeat it. Don’t worry that this makes you crazy. Just do it. Try it now.
Extra sharp cheddar cheese…. Extra sharp cheddar cheese… extra sharp cheddar cheese.
I don’t know about you, but right now I feel like… eating some really delicious extra sharp cheddar cheese. There is a real reason for this. Words are powerful. Words carry connotations with them. Different words may carry different connotations for different people. That particular connotation defines the emotion that the word will cause when said, heard, or thought by a particular individual. Emotions are the results of the hormones our brain produce as a result of a specific connotation. These hormones can trigger very real physiological reactions. Loving, kind, peaceful words create calm, and confidence, and positive chemicals that boost our immunities, lower blood pressure, make digestion, respiration, and even reproductivity more efficient. (I don’t think reproductivity is a word – but, it should be.) On the other hand, negative words that evoke anger, jealousy, sadness, despair, and fear can produce chemicals that evoke the fight or flight response, raise blood pressure, impair the immune system allowing viruses to harm the body, and if habitually felt, these emotions can damage blood cells, cause cancer cells to grow, and shave years off of your life. So the moment you feel yourself habitually cursing traffic, your boss, or anything, think of something that makes you feel good. Try it now. As an experiment hold the following words in your mind for a minute or two, and see how they make you feel emotionally and physically.
- Bubbles
- Chuckle
- Balloons
- Puppies
- Orphans
- Abandoned
- Poverty
- Lonely
How did they make you feel? The autonomic nervous system is that part of your nervous system that controls bodily functions beneath your consciousness. You don’t have to make your heart beat; your autonomic nervous system does it. You don’t have to make your stomach digest food; your autonomic nervous system does that. Many people operate as if their thoughts are part of that autonomic nervous system; they think they cannot control their thoughts. But your thoughts are not part of the autonomic nervous system. The thoughts that feel like they are not under your control are simply being controlled by habits you have formed. If those thoughts are positive, and are serving you, then continue the habits that create them. But if there is anything in your life that you do not like, know that your thoughts have manifested them. Whatever you think about the most, the nature of those thoughts, is what you draw into your life. It is what you become. It is what you attract. If you want new results, think new thoughts.
v Your habits and your thoughts are your destiny!
Choose differently. Choose again and again until you have new habits. Your habits, are you. Your habits create your destiny. We are all just a little nuts. We are more than bi-polar. We are multi-polar. We are not in touch with reality, because, what is reality? Isn’t it different depending upon your perspective. We all have multiple personalities. The secret is, to choose our best self. Every single person is afraid of something and in love with something. One person is gentle and harsh, cowardly and courageous, introverted and outgoing, lazy and hardworking at different times and in different places. The secret is to choose your best self, your highest self more often than not. Everything we do, think, and say is a choice. Choose to be awesome in every moment. Your choices have made you who you are in this moment. Who do you choose to be tonight, tomorrow, or five years from now. Choose awesomeness.
v Thou shalt make mistakes!
But if you stumble, and we all do, forgive yourself. Everything has a purpose, even our mistakes. They teach. They give us resilience. Everyone makes mistakes. Typos alwys hAppen. You don’t have to be perfect. So you think you made a mistake. Don’t worry about it; learn from it. Move on. Don’t doubt yourself. Don’t regret. Mistakes are simply the universe’s way of keeping us on the path that was meant for us. Every mistake brings you closer to where and who you are supposed to be. Had Ruth Wakefield not mistakenly run out of baker’s chocolate, she never would have invented the chocolate chip cookie. What a sad world that would be! Don’t question the mistake; God knows what He’s doing. If He didn’t want you to make that mistake, He wouldn’t have let it happen.
v Thou shalt be loved more than you will ever know!
We accept the responsibility and privilege of being your godparents because God has willed it. And when God says jump, you do it. We are so lucky to have you. You are our little girl. We couldn’t love you more if you were our flesh and blood. We are one part Catholic, one part Baptist/Universal Unitarian, and all parts Christian, and we will pray for you always. To Jesus, to Mary, to saints and angels. We will always be here for you. If you have questions, need an ear, a shoulder to cry on, or even bail money. You are loved more than you will ever know.
With hugs, kisses, and love forever,
True & Al
